How To Overcome Fear of Failure and Take Action On Your Dreams

Mindset & MotivationProductivity & Focus

Aug 15

If you're reading this post, chances are you're a woman who wants to create a life and business that she loves but maybe you're feeling stuck or burnt out. Or maybe you've been working towards that goal for years but still haven't gotten there.

I know how it feels to be frustrated with yourself because you feel like you aren't living up to your potential. And I know how it feels when you look at people and assume they have their ish together because of the way they present themselves online—chances are they're probably struggling just like you! (And sometimes, even more.) I also know what it feels like to be afraid of failure and sabotage your own success.

We see this all the time in our work with women who have dreams they want to pursue but feel like they'll never be able to make them happen. We see it in the way they talk about themselves and their lives—as though they're stuck in a rut or destined for a life of mediocrity and boredom because they don't think they're good enough or smart enough or whatever else has been holding them back from taking action on their dreams.

The truth is, we're all in this together, and it's hard to admit when we don't feel like we're winning at life. The good news is, there are ways to start moving forward again: ways to get back on track and start living your fullest potential!

But before we get into those steps, let's talk about why women in particular struggle so much with this issue. We all want approval from others—we all want people to think we're good, smart, and capable. But when you care too much about what other people think, it can become your primary focus in life. And when that happens, you can't possibly be happy—not because you don't have what you need but because you haven't truly embraced who you are. So, how do you get back on track?

How do you start living your fullest potential?

The first step is simply acknowledging that this is an issue for you: not because you're wrong or bad, but because it causes unnecessary stress, anxiety, and possible suffering in your life. Keep in mind this is not something we just wake up one day and change. It can be very difficult and it takes time and effort to shift your perspective. But once you acknowledge it you can start making those shifts so that you see yourself as worthy of love and approval regardless of what other people think.

Now, let's talk about how to get back on track.

First, you need to decide what's a priority for YOU. Not because someone else thinks it should be but because it matters to you. You need to decide what kind of person you want to be and make the necessary changes in your life. You need to acknowledge that you are the only one responsible for your happiness. Not anyone else and not some outside force. You also need to realize and accept that there will be times when you don't feel good enough. That's okay because it's normal, but if you let those feelings take over your life then they will hold you back from achieving your goals.

Here are 5 steps to help you get started:

1. Make a list of all the things you want from life—your career, relationships, hobbies, etc. Think about what makes you happy and how you want to feel every day.

2. Then, make another list of all the things that hold you back from those things: limiting beliefs (e.g., "I'm not good enough," "I don't deserve it"), and self-sabotaging habits (e.g., procrastination).

3. Challenge those beliefs. Examine them and question if they are 100%, without a shadow of a doubt, true. (e.g., "is it truly impossible for someone to start out not having all the answers but still find success?", Is it really true that if I don't have the perfect answer or solution, then my effort is futile?").

I like to imagine a small person wrestling with a giant. I was a wrestling fan as a kid and the technique I watched wrestlers use all the time was to sweep the bigger opponents' feet out from under them, keep them off balance, then knock them down. You're basically doing the same in this step.

4. Replace the limiting beliefs with new ones that are more in line with what you want.

3. Finally, write down three action steps that will further help you overcome these fears and achieve what's important to you: call someone who inspires you. (e.g., ask a friend out; go on an interview; start working on a project; etc.) Then commit to completing the action steps you listed. If you need to, enlist an accountability partner to keep you on track.

When you're done put your list somewhere where you'll see it every day (like in a planner, on a mirror, or on the fridge), and keep reminding yourself of your goals—even if it's just for five minutes each day. Remember that it's important to take small steps toward your goals and celebrate each one as a success.

Failure doesn't have to be something scary—it can actually be an opportunity for growth!